What can you talk about with a guy when you run out of topics for conversation: a list of proven topics. What not to talk about with the man you love

There has been such a situation with everyone - you met a girl who you really like, but you don’t know what to talk about with her. In this article, we will talk about how to choose the right topic for communication, find common interests with a girl and interest her.

Inappropriate topics for communication with a girl

Obviously, you should not talk to a girl about topics that she is not interested in. For example:

  • Racing cars and motorcycles - if she does not like speed, but prefers safe driving;
  • Horror or action movies if she prefers romantic comedies;
  • Computers and their components, unless of course your girlfriend is a hacker.

There are also a number of topics that should be excluded:

  • politics;
  • nationalism;
  • religion.

Your views may differ significantly, and then your romantic date may end in a quarrel.

Also, don't talk to girls about your "ex" girlfriends. Remember! Never! Take this as your rule.

We start communication. Getting to know the girl better

The only thing any person can talk about endlessly is about himself. If you don't know how to start a conversation with a woman - ask her tell about yourself. Here are the relevant topics:

  • What are her hobbies and what are her hobbies?
  • What kind of pastime does she like best - a quiet, calm atmosphere at home with a mug of coffee or nightly clubbing with friends;
  • What does her name mean, who is she according to the horoscope;
  • Does he believe in love at first sight and trust dream books;
  • What does she do in her free time, where she likes to go;
  • Pay special attention to her plans for the future;
  • Favorite drink, fragrance, movie, book, season, color;
  • Separately, you should ask about her favorite colors. Be sure to memorize them. When you come to your next date with a bouquet of her favorite flowers, it will definitely make a strong impression on her;
  • Ask if she has ever done crazy and thoughtless things, for what?

We continue communication. We are looking for points of contact.

So the exploration is over. You already have an idea of ​​what kind of person is sitting in front of you. Then the conversation should be continued on common, interesting topics for both of you. You have already formed a general opinion about the range of her interests. Well, you know your range of interests like the back of your hand. Where your interests intersect - there and you should look for the most interesting topics for conversations.

If there are no points of contact (this also happens), do not despair. You can always find topics that one way or another concern both. For example:

  • Favorite places in your city;
  • Weather;
  • Mutual acquaintances (if any);
  • Significant events and activities.

Additional win-win themes

Romance

All women on the planet are insanely romantic creatures. Tell me how you would like to meet sunrises and see off sunsets with her, look at the stars on the shores of the azure coast and admire its outlines in the moonlight.

Sport

Not all girls are athletes. But each of them is always trying to follow their figure. If you are a sports man, then this is your topic. Here she will listen to you very carefully.

Tell her about the benefits of a healthy lifestyle and proper nutrition, she may be trying to stick to it. Ask if she goes to the gym, or any sections - fitness, shaping, yoga, etc. If not, but she says that she always dreamed about it, offer her a joint visit to the gym or pool.

Art

Find out what kind of music she likes to listen to, what movies to watch. Perhaps she draws well or dances, sings or plays some musical instrument. If you are doing the same, then you will have something to talk about.

Her family and relatives

All girls love to tell how much they love their mom and dad. That they are an ideal couple for her and that, following their example, she would like to build her love.

If a girl has brothers or sisters, do not deprive them of an extra question. Ask their names, how old they are, what they like, where they study and what they would like to be in the future. If they are already adults, find out if they have their own families and how often they gather for common holidays or on weekends.

If your girlfriend has neither a brother nor a sister, you can talk with her about whether she ever wanted to have them and why. Find out more about her childhood. Did she go to kindergarten, did she like it there. Let him relax a little and plunge into the atmosphere of carefree years.

Animals

It is also worth talking with a girl about love for our smaller brothers. Every girl loves animals. Find out if she has a pet, be sure to ask what his name is and how old he is. Ask to see a photo! (for you it will play a plus). And if you yourself love animals, then you can talk endlessly on this topic.

Humor

Humor can be an added bonus. Laughter, as you know, prolongs life. Therefore, more jokes, especially if you are excellent at it, it turns out, tell some interesting and funny anecdote or a case from life. Just in case, you must always have 7-8 jokes in your arsenal for all occasions in life. If you can cheer her up, consider it in the bag.

compliments

The main thing is not to overdo it! Throw a couple of phrases about how wonderful she looks, how this dress suits her and perfectly matched lipstick (after all, she spent a lot of time on this before your date and it would be a pity if you don’t appreciate it) this article.

Sex

You have to be careful with this topic. Go to it only if you are sure that you already have a complete understanding. Wherein, should not touch her past lovers. But, for example, you can talk about your favorite poses.

It is better to bring up the topic of sex towards the end of the date. Talking about sex at the very beginning can scare her away.

Well, in general, in a conversation with a girl, act according to circumstances. Don't worry, don't be nervous and don't fuss. On a first date, don't force things. Imagine that she is your friend, whom you have not seen for 10 years. Don't be afraid to talk about what you like and try to learn more about her.

What can you talk about with your loved one (with a guy, with a man) on the "open spaces" of social networks? What topics would be interesting to talk about?

Love

You can talk about feelings endlessly! And in prose, and in verse, and with humor .... However, you need to “dilute” such a chic theme with others to make it more interesting! Talk about love until you can put into words what you feel. Tell us about what has accumulated in your heart.

Impression

Tell me where you've been, what you've seen. This will smoothly lead you to discussion, nostalgia. The conversation will be long and exciting if you get it right. And you can do it if you really want to.

Weather

Questions that will make this topic completely boring:

"How do you think…. What should I wear today?"

The guy will offer various options. You will discuss all this for a long time and come to some kind of common and interesting opinion.

“Do you remember what the weather was like a year ago? After all, we met on this day .... "

Here's what you'll be talking about.... Topics that this romantic question will prompt:

  1. Weather.
  2. Memories.
  3. Tenderness.
  4. Love.
  5. Poetry discussion.
  6. Confessions.

Talk about what's going on in the world

The Internet allows you to share links to pages, sites and forums. And the pictures?! They play a big role for those who belong to the visual type. Visuals are those people who mainly rely on the organ of sight. They love watching videos and reading.

In conversations, you can also touch on such topics:

  1. Sport.
  2. Cinema.
  3. Future plans.
  4. Memories of the past.
  5. Cooking.
  6. Shopping in hypermarkets, kiosks and online stores.
  7. Kids.
  8. Books.
  9. Travel and travel.

There are "magic" questions

If you can correctly ask them, the conversation will “roll over as a wave of understanding” between you. There are two types of such questions:

  1. Clarifying. The guy tells something, you carefully read and re-read, ask questions, "clinging" to every word from the guy's story. One story (even the smallest one) is capable of “giving birth” to more than a hundred questions!
  2. Counter. He asks you a question - you, answering it, ask a similar one and wait for an answer. Then you can compare the answers and draw conclusions about how similar you are.
  1. Think of or choose the question you want to ask the young person.
  2. Wait for a response (wait as long as necessary without imposing on the person).
  3. Actively develop the topic of communication.
  4. Answer all the questions that the man (boy) will ask.
  5. Ask a new question (this should be done when you feel that the conversation is "slowing down").

With a loved one you can talk about everything!

But there are topics that are best avoided on social networks so as not to quarrel:

  1. Former girls in his life. He won't discuss it with you! And if the discussion starts, he will not tell you the whole truth. Men are quite secretive in this matter (in the presence of a lady).
  2. Former men in your life. A man is afraid to learn new juicy details about you. All men are owners! Everything!
  3. Fiasco in sexual relations. If you want to talk about your failures - please! But don't touch the subject if it touches him. The question of sexual "failures" is a sore point for every man!
  4. Series, films about love. Of course, no one forbids talking about them! You just need to know how a man relates to this "kind" of cinema.
  5. Comparing a guy to someone else. You don't need to compare yourself to anyone! Remember that each person is an individual.
  6. Grievances. You don't have to "get hung up" on them! Forget them and forgive. Forget for real. So as not to remind them at the first scandal.
  7. Mistakes. These include: lies, betrayal, mistrust, doubt. Forgive immediately - do not think about what happened, now!
  1. Dedicate more time to reality! Virtual communication is not the kind of “contact” that is worth wasting your time on. You can't even imagine how short a human life is! Give preference to reality ....
  2. Answer the guy's questions if he asks them. Don't miss anything! Not a single detail! When you understand that he wants to speak out, listen to him. Even if the topic doesn't concern you.
  3. Don't talk exclusively about yourself on social media. Selfishness in the conversation is not welcome. Let the interlocutor insert his own words! There is no strength to wait for your “turn” to speak out - turn on willpower and patience! You will also have the opportunity to talk!
  4. Send your favorite photos, pictures, images, emoticons. Then the conversation will turn into the closest to the real. He will respond to the images in the same way - start communicating with “visuals”. What it is? What can be seen, what can be seen. Something to admire.
  5. Do not “transfer” the conversation to the topic that the loved one does not want to talk about, which he avoids. You only have a few options. Either talk about something neutral, or about what is interesting to your own little man, or on your general topics.
  6. Dilute the conversation with jokes, jokes and anecdotes. You'll see: it's much cooler! You can joke and start chatting on three or four social networks (simultaneously). Just turn off the sounds of incoming messages so that they do not tire you!
  7. Don't swear in conversations. And "stop" him if he starts using foul language. There should be no place for ugly and offensive words in your dialogue! Appreciate and love each other! After all, you might never meet ....
  8. Always give a warning if you go away for a while or leave the Internet. Enter - say hello, leave - say goodbye, please! Put emoticons to "revive" your communication. Look how infectious it is!

"We need to talk!" - it is with this phrase that for some reason not conversations begin, but most marital quarrels, and sometimes partings. Of course, this does not mean that problems should be left unresolved. But for some reason, the conversation, which is so important for women, for men becomes a senseless and merciless torture. What's the matter?

Prelude to Claims

Why are men so nervous about this harmless, in essence, phrase? Yes, because with such words a woman usually precedes complaints. Instead of a dialogue, a monologue begins, which develops into a whole waterfall of reproaches. The beautiful half starts an endless conversation about what does not suit her in the behavior of her partner, offends her, about the shortcomings of her beloved. She wants to say this: "I have a problem, let's change something together." But he hears: "You are not good enough, and I am unhappy with you." Any normal man in such a situation feels helpless: it turns out that he cannot make his girlfriend happy. Outcome: he is at an impasse, feels that he is accused, and from hopelessness. For her, the situation also looks dramatic: she complained about inconvenience, about problems in relations, and in response she received aggression - and no constructive dialogue.

Controversy since the Stone Age

These “translation difficulties” are literally built into us by nature, psychologists say. Men from cave times acted as earners and protectors. At the slightest hint of danger, they focused and looked around to assess the situation: is it necessary to fight now, or is it better to run away. When anxiety occurs, women seek emotional contact and support. Therefore, your loved one wants to immediately realize the problem and solve it as soon as possible. It is desirable that this requires one, the most simple and understandable action. And you, on the contrary, need to talk, and preferably for a long time and in detail: then you will finally feel calm.

For a woman, avoiding a conversation is tantamount to disaster: she feels that her partner is moving away from her. But the more she seeks contact with him and insists on the need to sort things out, the more the man closes in on himself. A vicious circle of alienation is formed: she is unhappy and abandoned, he is annoyed and scared. Really in this case there are only two ways out: to accept and endure or break off relations? In fact, everything is not so tragic. Just requests to your chosen one need to be translated from a female language into a male one.

Establish contact

First of all, connect . They will tell the partner that, despite all the problems, you remain a loving couple. Hug your loved one, take his hand, sit side by side together. Sex will help, and any joint actions - from walking to cleaning. When you feel this unity without words, it will be easier to turn a conversation about problems into a joint development of a solution, and not into a confrontation between warring parties.

Another important rule: when you start a conversation, do not talk about several problems at once. It will be especially bad if you jump from topic to topic. The male brain is capable of rationally processing only one stream of information. But, let's be honest, it does it faster and more efficiently than ours. Even if it seems to you that marital troubles are interconnected, and it is necessary to talk about all at once, refrain from this, otherwise a constructive dialogue will not work. Experts also recommend avoiding long introductions and reasoning aloud. Think about what you don't like and say it clearly and as briefly as possible.

The experience of many women confirms these scientific facts. Remember how many girlfriends complained to you about the inability to talk with their own man. Like, when girls try to start a conversation with words like: “We need to have a serious talk,” their husbands and boyfriends look miserable. Usually in such a situation, a man begins to think feverishly: “Oh God, what have I done wrong again ?!”. Don't fall into despair. Simply, if you have realized the problems, lay it out immediately - politely, but clearly. And, if possible, without preamble. It sounds elementary, but it will not be easy to do at first - given that we women are used to building a conversation in a completely different way. However, practice and you will see how magical the effect of this simple rule can be.

Do not forget about prevention - physical contact. They say that for harmony in the family, you need to hug your partner at least six times a day. At first, you can even count hugs. Let it look a little ridiculous, but it works on a purely physiological level. Physical contact releases oxytocin, the hormone of intimacy and calmness. In this way, you will improve the climate in your couple and “set the stage” for talking about problems, if necessary.

Hello! My name is Julia, I'm 17 years old, I'm dating a young man. I’ve been meeting for quite a while, but there’s nothing to talk about anymore ... He constantly asks me to tell him something, but I don’t know what to tell him about ... And when I ask me to tell him something, he too doesn't know what to say, and I don't know what else to ask him...
I’ve only been meeting with him for two months ... We talked about all possible and impossible topics, tormented my friends with the question of what else we could talk about with him ... Once I even sent him to my mother to ask what you can talk about with a girl. Mom, of course, as always, gave out two topics - children and weddings. And we have already talked about both of these topics many thousands of times ... He is very serious about it. Wants to marry me. Yes, and I don’t mind ... It’s just that another problem is that now he is in another city, so it becomes generally difficult to find a topic for conversation. And he will come next summer. I'm afraid that in such a terrible silence I just can't stand it and hang myself ...
I love him very much and he loves me too, but when we are silent, it feels like we are strangers to each other ... In general, an unpleasant feeling.
He always says "as you want, so be it, I agree with everything", but this is also impossible! What to do? I've been thinking about what to talk to him about for a week now... and I can't think of anything. Help me please! Thanks a lot in advance.

Open a website together? read topics, questions and discuss, summer is not enough! And you will learn everything about each other!

Good answer 2 bad answer 1

Hello Julia!

Do you have common interests? Aspirations? As a recommendation, read more books so that you can talk about different topics. Sincerely, Olesya.

Good answer 12 bad answer 2

Hello Julia! From your letter, it’s not entirely clear to me what you need help with in this situation: either how to find topics for communication with a partner, or are you worried that you generally have to strain yourself about this and you would like something at this moment understand and change. In any case, it is desirable to understand everything at a face-to-face consultation. It happens that chatter is only an illusion of closeness, and it happens that in joint silence there is a lot of presence and reciprocity. I wish you joy from various forms of interaction! Tatyana.

Good answer 1 bad answer 0

Hello Julia!

And why is silence so annoying that you strive to "clog the air" with conversations all the time? I agree with Tatyana Matveeva that it happens that in joint silence there is a lot of presence and reciprocity. But you, apparently, are somehow uncomfortable with such silent pauses in the conversation.

And here's what I'd like to pay attention to: He always says "as you want, so be it, I agree with everything." As if there is a mirror nearby... Do you want to look into this mirror all your life?

Svetlana.

Good answer 1 bad answer 1

Hello Julia!

The absence of topics for discussion with a partner, in my opinion, may mean the lack of mutual interest of partners in each other. When there is such interest, then there are no problems with finding topics. Check yourself if he is interesting to you as a person and a man, and why do you need a marriage with a person with whom there is nothing to talk about. And if there is no interest, then why, is it the same with all of you, or only with him. If only with him, then try to understand why. I think this self-examination will help you better understand yourself and your needs, and this understanding helps you find happiness and live effectively. All the best, Elena.

Good answer 2 bad answer 4